The Clunkster

makeup

Stupid Cupid

BeautyKristenComment
The Clunkster Cupid Makeup.jpg

Dear Reader, it’s been a while! Alas, I’ll spare you the details: work, tired, no time. Great, we’re all caught up! 

In the midst of this work, tired, no time cycle, I’ve somehow managed to become reacquainted with a single creative bone in my body for one whole day! Of course, I had to take advantage. What you see here is the result of a lot of time and even more glitter. Introducing, Cupid! 

I’ve been quite open about my distaste for certain holidays before, but Valentine’s Day is not one of them! I freakin’ love Valentine’s Day. My parents always went out of their way to make sure I knew that Valentine’s Day wasn’t just about romantic love, but family love, friend love, self love, pet love, and love in general. Since I’m everyone’s token optimist, I’m pretty much legally mandated to celebrate this holiday to the fullest.
But I realized that I’ve actually never done a Valentine’s Day look! And people in the makeup community (am I a part of the makeup community?) often overlook everyone’s favorite loverboy. 

So I had a good think about Cupid. I usually view him as sassy, clever, and mischievous. Does glitter fit into that anywhere? Yes. All of it. 

And so the next several hours were full of making Tik Toks and trying not to pop out of this costume that was entirely too tight on me (thanks quarantine!). And I gotta say, I’m pretty damn proud! What do you guys think? 

Spooky Scary Skeleton: Part II

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People of the Internet, you knew I couldn’t get through this Halloween season without creating another skeleton look, right? My entire life is peppered with skeletons year-round. How could you think I wouldn’t celebrate to the extent of my abilities during a time in which skeletons are extra acceptable? 

This look is a little different than my look last year, but I’m not sure which I like better! What do you think?

teenage frankenstein

KristenComment

Halloween is one of my favorite times of the year, mostly because I have the ultimate excuse to play dress-up! The number of spooky looks I’ve been seeing on my Instagram feed inspired me to buy some cheap Halloween makeup off of Amazon and go to town with absolutely no plan whatsoever.

I sat in front of my mirror and started painting my face green because it was a pretty color and ended up with black and blood and stitches and here I am, a teenage Frankenstein (cue Alice Cooper…). Maybe it’s not as great as other Halloween looks you’ve seen, but I’m honestly so proud of it. And it was the perfect way to get into the spirit of spooky season (as if I needed help)!

glossier's milky jelly cleanser

Beauty, Beauty Review, Cruelty-FreeKristenComment

Hello, beautifuls! I hope you’re enjoying these reviews, because I love writing them so much. I have a lot more coming for you, so stay tuned!

I’ve been paying attention to Glossier for a while now (you know, like everyone else on the planet), and have been wanting to give them a try, but I wasn’t sure which product I wanted to get. Then, I watched an Instagram story that compared a regular makeup remover to Glossier’s Milky Jelly Cleanser, and I was so amazed. I knew I needed to get my hands on a bottle right away.

Basically, I’m famous for getting my makeup… everywhere. I’ve been using the same cold cream cleanser to take my makeup off since I started wearing it (just like my mom!) and even though I think I’m getting all my makeup off my face, I soon find tan blotches all over my towels and boyfriends’ shirts. Obviously, this plan has not been going well.

Then, I met Milky Jelly, and it was love at first cleanse. I use this to wash my face every night before bed, whether I’m wearing makeup or not. I’ve never found a face wash that makes me feel so, well, cleansed! My skin just feels so squeaky clean and silky soft. This cleanser makes me look forward to washing my face!

It also does a phenomenal job of taking off my copious eye makeup. I usually pump a little onto a wet tissue and rub it on my eye. It takes my makeup right off. I feel like it actually slides off my eyes. I don’t have to rub as much, so my precious baby lashes can live. And my eyes feel cleansed too. Did you know that your eyes could feel cleansed?

Since I saw the Instagram story advertising Milky Jelly, I’ve wanted to try the same experiment. So, I put on a ridiculous amount of makeup and took off one half of my face using Pond’s Cold Cream Cleanser, and the other using Glossier’s Milky Jelly Cleanser. I used two white towels to take my eye makeup off, and another two towels to wipe my face after I was done washing it.

Pond’s towels

Glossier towels

The towels that I used on my eyes looked relatively similar. Though the cold cream towel looked darker, I found that I had more left on my eye than the Glossier side. The difference between the face towels, however, was pretty staggering. It’s nice to remind myself how much better, cleaner products are really helping me and my skin. 

If you couldn’t tell, I’m Milky Jelly’s number one fan. I’m looking forward to trying more of Glossier’s products!

Physician's Formula's Organic Wear Natural Origin Work It! Full! Flared! Fit! Mascara

Beauty, Beauty Review, Cruelty-FreeKristenComment

You all know how much I love my eyelashes. Mascara is the most important part of my makeup routine, so I’ve been on the hunt for a mascara that I really, really love. Last year, I tried out Physician’s Formula’s Organic Wear Natural Origin Work It! Full! Flared! Fit! Mascara. That was fun to type.

The reason I took a look at Physician’s Formula’s products in CVS was because the mascara that I was using previously was starting to make my eyes really itchy, and I knew that Physician’s Formula uses hypoallergenic ingredients. I wanted to find something that stayed on really well, since that was also a problem I was having, but my number one concern was the itchiness. Thankfully, I found this mascara (I can’t type all those exclamation points again), which claimed to address both concerns.

The packaging of this mascara claims that this formula is “guaranteed to last through your toughest workout,” and “delivers maximum strength adherence.” So I figured this was the one to try.

The Pros

This mascara definitely didn’t make my eyes itchy, but I’m not sure if I can attribute that to the organic ingredients. I love a good all-natural formula, but since I bought this mascara I’ve used organic formulas that make me itchy and non-organic formulas that don’t. So I don’t really think it’s relevant.

I’m a really big fan of the brush. It covers a lot of ground and its bristles get in between my lashes, which I really love. I like mascara better when it helps me define and lift my lashes as opposed to giving them volume, which is exactly what this mascara did. I love the way it looks on my lashes. This mascara indeed makes me feel both “Full!” and “Flared!”

The Con

I’m such a fan of Physician’s Formula’s mission to use organic ingredients to help sensitive skin. But I can’t ignore that the claims that this mascara is “10K Proof. Gym Proof. Sweat Proof. Water Resistant,” are completely untrue. After about a week of wearing this mascara, I found myself crying in public (hey, it happens to the best of us). I wiped away my tears and honestly didn’t think about how I looked because I was wearing my new rigorously waterproof mascara.

Guys. I got home and looked in the mirror, and I had mascara all over my face. Literally all over my face.

Usually, when I cry with makeup on, my mascara gets clumpy and stubborn, so when I wipe my tears things just get a little sticky but I only look a little bit like a raccoon. In this case, however, my tears took the formula and collected it into small pools under my eyes which then descended down my face in small rivers. And wiping my tears didn’t help things at all!

I really don’t mean to be harsh, but I was very disappointed with this part of the formula because Physician’s Formula claimed that this mascara is “rigorously tested to withstand your most athletic activities,” but it couldn’t withstand an anxiety attack on the T. Since this was a big part of why I decided to purchase this mascara, I felt really let down.

We were rooting for you, Physician’s Formula. We were all rooting for you.

Overall though, I definitely recommend this mascara for days when you know for a fact you won’t be crying or for days you don’t care if you have Physician’s Formula decorating your cheeks. I really loved the way this formula made my lashes look, so I would only use it when I would go out or to top off my lashes after I used another mascara. I’m done with the tube now, and I don’t think I’d purchase it again, but I’m happy I gave this brand a try. I probably won’t buy any other Physician’s Formula products in the future because I don’t trust a lot of what they say now, to be honest. But if Physician’s Formula works for you, I’m so happy!


For more information about going cruelty-free, check out PETA’s Searchable Database or Cruelty-Free Kitty’s alphabetized list of cruelty-free brands.